How to bury [Islamic] terrorists

The Naple News ^ | 12/9/02 | DEROY MURDOCK

[Travis McGee]

I think we will see the virtual end of the insane murder cult. It's going to evaporate like snow in the sahara.

[SwordofTruth]

They believe that contact with hogs slams the Pearly Gates shut. Hello, Miss Piggy. Goodbye, 72 virgins.

This is the funniest thing I’ve read all night. Hope it's true; it would make defeating the Islamic terrorists a piece of pig. LOL!

[dennisw]

Is GDG correct in #29?
___________________

I don't know much about this idea. I would test it out. Start burying their dead in pigskins and see if it affects the Jihad. I fear Islam would issue Fatwahs saying a martyr is not affected by being buried in pig skin.

[dcwusmc]

I think the contact would have to be PRIOR to death. Maybe wrapping them in a pigskin just prior to shooting them would do the trick. I had made the suggestion to a Marine Col. in November 2001. Dunno how far up the chain it went. I also added the suggestion that an Imam be found who would condemn the soon-to-be dead to hell for their deeds. That WOULD assure them of their lack of companionship in the afterlife (except for their sheep or their buds in the next burner...)

[knighthawk]

I am not sure, but I know that muslims believe that on the last day they will be ressurected. So technicly this means it does not matter how they died or buried.

[Matthew James]

Blackjack Pershing Bump!

[Vinomori]

Better yet, let's starve some pigs a little bit and have them eat the remains of any terrorist. We could film it and put it on the web, let Al Jazeera play it, and then play it on pay-per view in the U.S. with the proceeds going to the families of victims of 9-11.

This is some of the most marvelous writing and thinking since Hubert Selby and Terry Southern's Magic Christian.

[Travis McGee]

Are those Pershing stories truth or apocrypha?

[tomswiftjr]

I agree. Actually this procedure can be reviewed on film since THE REAL GLORY (1939) starring Gary Cooper and David Niven showed the Phillipine pig burial incident (a bit of historical fiction).

[Matthew James]

Good question - that's been the topic of discussion at work. The consensus is that it's true, but I have no proof at this time. --Nobody's had the time to do the real research!

[Pistolshot]

Totally true.

Pershing was respected so much by the Imams on the islands after this that they made him a Chief of ALL the tribes.

Frank Vandiver's BLACK JACK describes it in great detail.

[demosthenes the elder]

*grins*
all are dimly remembered excerpts from a bogus/spoof AP report I cooked up in the middle of the air campaign prior to the ground offensive in Desert Storm.
Additional bits I recall are "...a lard slick in the Persian Gulf drifting slowly towards the newly renamed Straits of Hormel..." and "shell-shocked iraqi prisoners of war complain about the inhuman devices, saying "SPAMM is the Devil's work!""
I wish I still had that paper - it was a hoot.

[demosthenes the elder]

solution: execution by firing squad, armed with raw pork bullets. At close range, a meat bullet (especially if frozen) is just as lethal as a metal one. side benefit: the meat is indistinguishable from human tissue by normal means, so no muslim undertaker would be able to separate the Allah-offending pollution from the corpse.

[demosthenes the elder]

KILLS THUGS DEAD!

(and bars them from Paradise)

[BOBWADE]

ROTFLOL!

[demosthenes the elder]

just for the record:
mhking coughed up the original RAID can and so far as I know made the initial reference to wiping out pests...
a user by the nik of Dark Nerd inserted the dead jihadi graphic and the "JIHADI" text. All I did was tweak "RAID" into "LARD" and add the motto.