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To those of us who have children in our lives, whether they are our
own, grandchildren, nieces and nephews, or students... here is something
to make you chuckle
.
Whenever your children are out of control, you can take comfort
from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to His own
children.
After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve.
And the first thing he said was,
"Don't!"
"Don't what?" Adam replied.
"Don't eat the forbidden fruit." God said.
"Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit ?
Hey, Eve we have forbidden fruit !"
"No way !"
"Sure Nuff!"
"Do NOT eat the fruit !" said God.
"Why?"
"Because I am your Father and I said so!" God replied, (wondering
why he hadn't stopped Creation after making the elephants).
A few minutes later, God saw His children having an
apple break and was He ticked !
"Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" God, as our first parent, asked.
"Uh huh," Adam replied.
"Then why did you?" said the Father.
"I don't know," said Eve.
"She started it !" Adam said,
"Did not !"
"Did too !"
"DID NOT !"
Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam
and Eve should have children of their own. Thus, the pattern was set and it has never changed!
But there is reassurance in this story.
If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself. If God had trouble raising children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for you ?
Advice for the day:
If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on an aspirin bottle: "Take two Aspirin"
and "Keep away from children."
A FEW ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ! ...
CHILDREN: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them
to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 telling them to sit down and be quiet.
Grandchildren....God's reward for not killing your children!!
Mothers of teens know why some animals eat their young.
Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word
for word what you shouldn't have said.
The main purpose for hosting a party for your children and their
friends is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own.
"We child-proofed our home 3 years ago and they're still getting in!"
Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home!

If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself. If God had trouble raising children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for you ?

Thanks for these timely words of wisdom, Dubya.

My daughter came home from college and ran up our home phone bill to $600.00. My car insurance bill just came in, and to insure her 1991 Honda with PIP costs more than our 2 other vehicles with comprehensive coverage. She is in the living room watching "Spinal Tap" on full volume. But earlier in the evening we had a discussion about women and the military...