[SFConservative]

1000 C for 5 seconds.

Good to see that you remember your Arrhenius Law from your chemistry classes.

Similarly, if you cook the turkey at 70 degrees F for 105 days it should be perfect. You just have to remember to set it out on the counter on August 15 at 3 pm sharp so it's ready on November 28 at 3 pm. But I did it this year and it sure looks and smells great!

[Saturnalia]

Of course, you could do it the QUICK way and just stick the turkey on an Athlon.

That sucker will be done in under two blinks.