[tomkow6]

Today's FEEBLE attempt at humor:

CHEMICAL PROPERTIES OF MEN AND WOMEN

Element Name: WOMAN
Symbol: Wo
Atomic Weight: Don't even go there!!
Physical Properties: Generally round in form. Boils at nothing and may
freeze at any time. Melts whenever treated properly. Very bitter if not used
well.
Chemical Properties: Very active. Highly unstable. Possesses strong affinity
to gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones. Violent when left alone.
Able to absorb great amounts of exotic food. Turns slightly green when
placed next to a better specimen.
Usage: Highly ornamental. An extremely good catalyst for dispersion of
wealth. Probably the most powerful income reducing agent known.
Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands.


Element Name: MAN
Symbol: Xy
Atomic Weight: 180 +/- 50
Physical Properties: Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find
pure sample.
Chemical Properties: Attempts to bond with Wo any chance it can get. Also
tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when mixed with Kd
(element: child) for prolonged period of time. Neutralize by saturating with
alcohol.
Usage: None known. Possibly good methane source. Good samples are able to
produce large quantities on command.
Caution: In the absence of Wo, this element rapidly decomposes and begins to
smell.