[Utilizer]

"I really do need to think on this. Soft-spoken? Is this in the genes? I come from a large, loud family. That's why I ask. That doesn't change that we treat each other well and with respect, but we can be kind of loud."

Volume was not the issue; brazen trumpeting arrogance is.
Although I personally find loud women rather difficult to endure on a continual basis, I have a very good friend named Berta, of Portugese descent whom I have known now for over two decades -and she is loud, outspoken, and very self-confident.
She is also continually happy, smiling, laughing, and has no problem with smilingly sidling up to Me and continually flirting outrageously, with many sexual innuendo-laden comments making up the majority of the dialogue.*laugh* She also works full time so she can afford a little apartment of her own, visits constantly at her mother's place to take care of her, as she (her mum) is in failing health, is continually driving all over the place on the week-ends to make sure her siblings and their spouses and children are in good health at their various domiciles, is still hoping to find a good man to marry and settle down with, and all in all, just has a heart of gold -and I love her to death (not romantically) and will do any favour she asks Me.
Although My personal preference is for a more soft-spoken individual, I hope you can understand why I will gladly expend any effort to assist her, and enjoy spending time with her. She quite deserves anything it is in My power to assist with.

[Desdemona]

Although My personal preference is for a more soft-spoken individual, I hope you can understand why I will gladly expend any effort to assist her, and enjoy spending time with her. She quite deserves anything it is in My power to assist with.

Well, of course I would understand. I've been accused of being a bit too loud on occasion, that's all. It comes from being from a big family and always having to speak loudly to be heard. I've tried to watch it, but it's not always easy. In the profession that found me, I've had to learn real, honest, true manners and have had to do it without much help other than observation and mimicry (okay, I'll confess to reading Judith Martin and Emily Post). Although, I find I prefer it to baseness.

I have no problem with people putting family first. None at all. That's really how I was raised. I try not to, but I do sometimes wish my family was less "in-your-face" American, but that can't be helped.