Clinton library donors sought - $35 donation to project will get you a holiday ornament

Associated Press ^ | September 17, 2002 | Associated Press Staff

[Buchanan mama]

I can't wait to see Hillary's autobiography!

Especially her circumstances surrounding her birth!

[dalereed]

"Potential $35 donors should recall that the Clinton White House tree ornaments were pornographic."

The $35 donation model will probably be a small bent penis on a string.

[Dick Bachert]

Ask and ye shall receive:

A recently discovered little known fact may help to explain Hillary Clinton's aggressive and domineering personality: She is, in fact, Adolph Hitler's long lost daughter.

2 months before her suicide with Adolph in the infamous Berlin bunker, Eva Braun gave birth to little Hildegard Shickelgruber and arranged to have the baby smuggled across Allied lines to France.

In Marseilles, France, the child was delivered to a kind-hearted ship's captain. Upon landing in New Orleans, the captain personally carried the infant to the home of Eva's second cousin, Dorte Dittlemann, in Stuttgart, Arkansas.

The rest, as they say, is history! We'll save you the math: Hillary's 57 years old.