[chnsmok]

Conservative Bumper Stickers

VOTE DEMOCRAT or we will pull your file

Ignore the Media...Think for yourself.

STOP SOCIALISM.... IMPEACH CLINTON!

I THINK, THEREFORE I VOTE REPUBLICAN

"Annoy a liberal, Work Hard and Smile."

If Clinton's against it, it MUST be good.

It takes a village to raise an idiot.

Poor Bill...Stuck with Hillary!
Poor Hillary...Stuck with Bill!
Poor US...Stuck with both of em!

"Earth First! We'll log the other planets later."

Gotta Over Regulate Everything

After finishing taxes, I owed the IRS $1.46.
I'm sure at least $500 was spent to file my check.

Ever notice how all the "CELEBRATE DIVERSITY" bumper stickers look the same?

PLEASE WORK HARDER! THERE ARE MILLIONS ON WELFARE COUNTING ON YOU.

"I'm not politcally correct I AM RIGHT"

FIGHT CRIME... SHOOT BACK!

Asking government to fight greed is like asking Adolph Hitler to fight racism.

AMERICA DOES NOT OWE YOU A LIVING.

"Clinton for President--Anything to get him the hell out of Arkansas!"

"Stop global whining."

VOTE REPUBLICAN ITS LESS TAXING

If guns cause crime, then matches cause arson.

"A Liberal knows as much about Economics as Hitler did about Human Rights."

Spotted Owls taste like chicken.

Be a hero, save a whale. Save a baby, go to jail.

Money's not everything, But it will keep the DNC in touch

Nancy picked the silverware. Barbra picked the China. Hillary picked the Cabinet.

VOTE DEMOCRATIC: It's easier than getting a Job!

If We're Not Supposed to Eat Animals, Why Are They Made Out of Meat?

I am Clinton of Borg: Your wealth will be assimilated!

I LOVE ANIMALS.....THEY TASTE GREAT

"Gun Control Is Being Able To Hit Your Target"

"Only an (picture of democrat donkey) would vote Democratic."

CLINTON'S Motel 1600
Call 1-800-DNC-DONR

Don't blame me! - I voted republican!

Friends don't let friends vote democrat.

"POLITICALLY CORRECT? - bite me!"

DON'T FEEL MY PAIN! FEEL MY WALLET... IT'S EMPTY!

"If we're RIGHT, what are you?"

CLINTON DIDN'T INHALE; HE JUST SUCKS!

[admiralsn]

Thanks for the "dim" jokes tonight. My copy/paster was working overtime tonight. Goodnight.

[lonestar]

This is an old one, but I got it again tonight.

I WAS TRAVELING BETWEEN BATON ROUGE AND HOUMA THE OTHER DAY SOUTH OF NAPOLEONVILLE WHEN A TIRE BLEW OUT. CHECKING MY SPARE, I FOUND THAT IT TOO WAS FLAT. MY ONLY OPTION WAS TO FLAG DOWN A PASSING MOTORIST AND GET A RIDE TO LABADEVILLE.

THE FIRST VEHICLE TO STOP WAS AND OLD MAN IN A VAN. HE YELLED OUT THE WINDOW, "NEED OF LIFT?"

"YES I SURE DO," I REPLIED.

"YOU A DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN " ASK THE OLD MAN.

"REPUBLICAN,"I REPLIED. "WELL, YOU CAN JUST GO TO HELL" YELLED THE OLD MAN AS HE SPED OFF.

ANOTHER GUY STOPPED, ROLLED DOWN THE WINDOW, AND ASKED ME THE SAME QUESTION. AGAIN I GAVE THE SAME ANSWER, "REPUBLICAN." THE DRIVER GAVE ME THE FINGER AND DROVE OFF. I THOUGHT IT OVER AND DECIDED THAT MAYBE I SHOULD CHANGE MY STRATEGY, SINCE THIS AREA SEEMED TO BE OVERLY POLITICAL AND THERE APPEARED TO BE FEW REPUBLICANS.

THE NEXT CAR TO STOP WAS A RED CONVERTIBLE DRIVEN BY A BEAUTIFUL BLONDE. SHE SMILED SEDUCTIVELY AND ASKED IF I WAS A DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN. "DEMOCRAT", I SHOUTED. "HOP IN !", REPLIED THE BLONDE.

DRIVING DOWN THE ROAD , I COULDN'T HELP BUT STARE AT THE GORGEOUS WOMAN IN THE SEAT NEXT TO ME, THE WIND BLOWING THROUGH HE HAIR, PERFECT BREAST, AND A SHORT SKIRT THAT CONTINUED TO RIDE HIGHER AND HIGHER UP HER THIGHS.

FINALLY, I YELLED "PLEASE STOP THE CAR." SHE IMMEDIATELY SLAMMED ON THE BRAKES AND AS SOON AS THE CAR STOPPED, I JUMPED OUT. "WHAT'S THE MATTER?", SHE ASKED. "I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE," I REPLIED. "I'VE ONLY BEEN A DEMOCRAT FOR FIVE MINUTES AND ALREADY, I WANT TO SCREW SOMEBODY."