[robjna]

I was a pot smoker from age 16 to 38 so i have a back ground to speak on this subject. I do not dismiss this report nor think it to be bunk. The best thing that ever happen to me was to not only quit pot but cigarettes at the same time. My only hope is that is has not taken away to many years of my life and that my heart and lungs can recuperate.

I would like to make some observations and beliefs about pot that comes from 20 + years of use.

1. Almost your whole life revolves around the abilty to get high. When can i do it next? how can i do it? Will anyone catch me?

2. You spend enormous amounts of energy making sure you have your stash. you use friends and anyone else to help you get your stuff. The worst feeling in the world was the end of your bag, you would ration it out in hopes that you can make it to the next bag. When supplies are low you go in panic mode as you may have to wait days to get the next bag. You smoke resin from your pipe and hunt down your stash areas in hopes you forget some.

3. The let downs sometimes get severe , often fighting off headaches and drowsiness. You blame it on lack of sleep or some other reason why you have headaches , but you know it is from coming off your high. After it clears , you light up again and start all over.

4. It controls most facets of yuor life. Most of your decisoions are based on pot. I can smoke a joint after my sales call. I can smoke before i pick up my friend. My wife won't be home for an hour so i can light up. I have to go get gas( i need to lite up). Time to take out garbage( time to lite up).

5. You will take unusual risks just to get high. Stashing it in your shoes on overseas flights so you still have it on vacation. Emptying half of the tobacco from your cigarette and filling it with pot so you can smoke it in public. sneaking it in the hotel fire escapes even though it is going to reek up the hallway. Doing one hits and blowing smoke into bathroom vent.

6. It does make you an introvert. Nothing will shut down your abilty to socialize more than being stoned. You lose the confidence and a desire to communicate with others. Often when you do speak, you don't make as much sense to others as to yourself. You become an observer and your circle of friends never expands. You come off as aloof or stuck up often. people get the impression you would rather not be with them, which is true because you would rather be with "mary-do-ya-wanna"

7. It does create panic attacks and sometimes affect your nervous system. The scariest monent i can recall is driving with my family stoned. I lose feeling in my right leg and i am in panic mode. I have my wife and my kids and i am scared. My wife asks me whats wrong and why am i going so slow. I am scared stiff and just want the ride to be over. This starts to happen over and over again , but i still keep smoking. Once i am driving thru the mountains outside of tahoe with my wife , my mother -in law and great aunt and i an convinced i am going off the side of the mountain and i cant explain to them why i afraid to drive any faster. My heart starts to race often while i am high from panic attacks.

8. It is not just the fact of getting high, it is dealing with all that comes with getting high. It is illegal, so you have to deal with peolple , who in essence are criminals. With that comes risks that you do not need to take. Every time you get another bag, it could be the cops coming around the corner because they flipped your supplier. You get pulled over for speeding and they find your stash in the car or they see your blood shot eyes and grill you.

Not until i led a striaght mans life , did i notice all the things i missed out on because i was to busy getting high. Most every picture of me thru those years has blood shot eyes. I never gave my kids the full attention on their projects because I was either to high or to burned out to focus. I spent 15 years of marriage lying about something that was a daily part of my life. So i don't buy the arguement that you can smoke pot and be succesful. Yes, I was succesful in business, but i was failing in life. My single biggest accomplishment in my life will be kicking pot and cigarettes at the same time. To realize you can live your life without stimulants is amazing. I still give in the occasional vice of a cigar on special occasions or a drink at a social event, but they have no meaning in my life. Living longer and healthier have all the meaning now.

[sweet_diane]

robjna
Thank you for sharing your recovery story..and way to go! My Husband is a recoverying alcoholic and I do volunteer work at a local rehab center... I know the destruction of addiction. It's always a blessing to me to see the joy of recovery. :)

[A2J]

My single biggest accomplishment in my life will be kicking pot and cigarettes at the same time.

Bless you.

Unfortunately, to many libertarians you're nothing but a "traitor."

[-YYZ-]

Good description of the life of a chronic MJ smoker. I've been there, too, although maybe not quite as bad. I was never a very outgoing person in the first place, so pot didn't make a big difference that way to me. And I've never experienced the panic attacks you describe.

Having said all that, would you agree that most people who use pot do not go on to this kind of chronic usage? (Although, among older users chronic users make up a larger percentage, as opportunities for use and availability tend to decrease as you get older). In fact, I would say most people can take it or leave it. Some of us have addictive personalities. If not for pot I would drink a lot more often. Oh, and one more thing, I would have to note that several of the negative effects of chronic use that you describe are more the result of its illegality than of the substance itself.

What's your opinion, does the current regime of illegality have a positive or negative effect?

[jayef]

I'm glad you sobered up. Obviously you should not smoke marijuana as you seem to have an inability to regulate your use. Did you consider that my experience and the experience of others might be completely different?

[Sir Gawain]

So was it the fault of the drug, or were you using the drug as a means of escape?

In any case, yours is a good example of why we should make it illegal so people won't be able to have access to....oh, wait.

[liberallarry]

I have smoked pot for more than twice as long as you.

My experiences are quite different. Since I loved being physically healthy I never smoked more than once or twice a week and - as I've gotten older - I've cut down until now months go by without a hit. I tried many other drugs but immediately dispensed with them as too difficult, too dangerous, too expensive, or not what I wanted. Pot was never more than interesting entertainment and mildly performance enhancing under the right circumstances.

My point is not that you were wrong and I right but that individual experiences are different. I don't want to be prohibited from enjoying pot because you can't handle it. Nor should I be.

[newcats]

Interesting list there....
I have been smoking since I was 14 (am 47 now) so I have a few more years of experience than you. I have never..NEVER experienced any of the symptoms that you described, nor have any of my "smoking buddies".
All of us are steadily employed, and do not focus our life or energies looking for our next "fix". Your post reminds me so much of the propaganda in the 30s, and could have been taken from the script notes for Refer Madness. Thanx for the chuckle.

[dirtboy]

My single biggest accomplishment in my life will be kicking pot and cigarettes at the same time.

Good for you, that is something to be proud of. Now if I may ask a question - pot was negatively affecting your life. What would be the most beneficial path for the law to take towards that problem - legalize and ignore the problem, incarcerate you and give you a felony record if you got caught with a dime bag, or evaluate you and force you into treatment if you got caught with a dime bag?