>>you keep the kid and keep sending me money<<
This is a surprisingly common situation.
You can kiss the money goodbye, please don't spend any emotional energy or fees on that issue-the money is gone, forget about it.
Save your energy for caring for your child.
Yes, that's what we've done up to now. But if custody becomes "official" in about 10 days, at least we can stop paying. In this state they do at least believe the money goes where the child resides.
Otherwise, they would be too "obviously" biased... 8^>