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Ya know, I'm a perfect candidate for hating men. My husband left me for his true love when my girls were 4, 7 and 8. I could wallow in self pity, as you seem to be doing, or I could make something of myself. Guess what? I wallowed for about 2 weeks, brushed myself off, checked into the university and enrolled in the engineering program. And you know what? I'm so glad my husband left me. It's really the best thing that could have happened. I have confidence, I'm not a 'mousy woman' talking about what a fabulous career my husband has to all my girl friends, and I like myself. I met a fabulous man, we've been together for 8 years, and he's been a better dad to my girls than their father. Now, My kids are grown, I'm a corporate exec, with an MBA and playing with the big boys and I'm doing a damn good job too. So, lose the attitude, it won't help you in the big picture. I'm not trying to rip on you, you need to realize women aren't dependant on men, they just make our lives nicer, sweeter, and just all around happier.

PS. my ex is on his fourth marriage.

Good for you. You sound like a strong, intelligent woman.
I don't have an attitude, I just refuse to be anyone's doormat. There is nothing wrong with companionship, you just have to watch out for yourself because no one else will. I just had that lesson reinforced a couple of days ago when I was betrayed by someone that I love dearly.
I was angry that several people on this thread blamed everything on Women. I am NOT wallowing in self-pity. I just decided to start standing up for myself. Just what is wrong with that?

So, lose the attitude, it won't help you in the big picture. I'm not trying to rip on you, you need to realize women aren't dependant on men, they just make our lives nicer, sweeter, and just all around happier.

Now that is an inspiring reply. I wish more women would realize that they don't need to rely on attaching to a man for financial support. They can do it all on their own. My wife has consistently made more money than me in her computer programming job. I'm not ashamed about that at all. In fact I'm proud of her. And I also have the sense of well-being that if anything ever happened to me, that she would be able to provide for our kids without having to sink into poverty or seek out another man. If we ever split up (not that I see that happening), I would gladly pay my child support and be a father to my kids. But I wouldn't have to worry about alimony. She can take care of herself just fine.

To all you women out there who are housewives, ain't nothing wrong with that. But be aware that if your marriage falls apart, you have options. You don't have to take your ex for every dime he's got and trump up charges against him to gain leverage in court. You can work out a civil and fair settlement and then get out there and make your own living. There is no secret to having a career. You just get out there, learn some skills, bust your butt and get it done. I'm not saying it's easy, but it's a lot better than sitting at home in misery, looking for ways to connive another measly $25 a month from your ex every six months.

BTW, your husband must have been a real moron to leave you.

I don't know the specifics of your situation, so I will not comment. However, don't look down on traditional women, for they are what helped bring about a strong country, just as strong men helped bring about a strong country. As it now stands, many women are neglecting their children for a career. I hope you're not knocking on them, for they are a great asset.