I'm trying to think why I've been skipped so far. Perhaps because I've already had three colonoscopies? Could the doctor who did my last one be an alien? His name sounds kind of funny.
You haven't been skipped. It is well-known that 94% of proctologists are aliens, who have assumed human guise so they can freely indulge their nefarious, other-worldly practice of anal probing.
As for the other 6% ... you don't want to know.