It's a Man Thing (True 4th)

tx.guns crosspost | 7/9/02 | Wharton

[Vigilantcitizen]

You mean like these?

[JRandomFreeper]

bang ping

[splach78]

Thanks to people like you, who illegally set off fireworks in my neighborhood, I no longer have to battle crowds to see them. And my kids can sleep through it or run around my front yard. Much nicer this way.

[dtel]

LMAO.

[MonroeDNA]

You ROCK!!!!!

[MonroeDNA]

"Thanks to people like you, who illegally set off fireworks in my neighborhood, I no longer have to battle crowds to see them."

Would you like some cheese to go with that wine?

[splach78]

What didn't you understand about my post? I am not whining, and I am thankful for people who do this. I don't battle the stupid crowds, and my infant can sleep through it, while my toddler runs around my front yard. I said it was much nicer this way.

[pocat]

LMAO!

[El Gato]

All I was thinking was the fact that this thing was probably put together by a political prisoner in a hellhole somewhere

You think they'd trust that sort with all that gunpowder? Somehow, I don't think so. A few of the rockets, with "augmented" payloads, might find themselves targeted on the camp commander's bedroom some night.

[Teacher317]

Real American boys DO still exist... even in the adult sizes. ;^)

[El Gato]

Real American boys DO still exist... even in the adult sizes. ;^)

Obviously "someone" needs to increase the doses of their meds, and the fraction of American boys that are getting those meds. NOT!

[marktwain]

Doesn't everybody with an ounce of brains do this sort of thing while growing up.... and then graduate to better, bigger, more expensive toys?

[Shooter 2.5]

This was the heading the first time I read this:

friend from Boeing sent me this;

From: JXXXXXX, RXXXX X
Sent: Thursday, April 05, 2001 10:06 AM
Subject: Sorry you're not here...

[Lurker]

Thanks.

What a great site.

L

[Lurker]

"The fuse burn time was in the 1/1000ths of a second range."

Cigarette fuse.......

L

[Lurker]

My brother, myself, and a friend of ours had saved our money for almost a year and blew about 500 bucks or so on a massive pile of rockets, missiles, and shells a few years back.

4th of July weekend, we loaded up our pickups and headed to a small lake in southern Michigan where my younger brothers father in law has a cabin.

We had a lovely barbecue and the beer flowed freely as we waited for it to get dark enough to begin our little show.

Most of the families on this rather small lake were doing exactly the same thing we were doing, but we were convinced we had the best and biggest fireworks on the lake.

We hauled our stash out to a small point while our wives retreated to the relative safety of the pontoon boat about 20 yards away.

The three of us (no our names are not Moe, Larry, and Curly) spent about half an hour pounding PVC pipe into the ground so we could launch bottle rockets over the lake.

We left our arsenal at the base of a tree which was about 20 feet behind us.

After having just one more beer, we decided to start our show with something substantial. I selected a really impressive looking missile that you just set on the ground and lit.

Well, I set it on the ground, and lit the fuse. Unfortunately, I neglected to look up before I lit the damned thing. The missile took off exactly as its designers had intended. It hit a branch of the tree we were standing under, made a 90 degree turn, smacked into the trunk of the tree and made another 90 degree turn and screamed straight down into the pile of fireworks we had saved an entire year to buy.

Then, the missile exploded once again exactly as its designers had intended.

There are not adequate words in the English language to describe the mayhem created when over 500 dollars worth of really big fireworks go off unexpectedly with three rather inebriated people right next to it.

Our wives later described it as akin to watching one of those old Road Runner cartoons but with three Wiley Coyotes all tripping over each other while trying to escape several pounds of exploding gunpowder and white hot magnesium sparks.

I remember during one particularly bright flash seeing my brother diving into the lake while trying to escape an entire package of bottle rockets that were headed directly at his ass.

I'll carry that image with me till the day I die.

Our friend, (who is a rather short and rotund man of almost 200 pounds) moved faster than I have ever seen him move before or since.

Needless to say, I haven't been invited back to that cabin.

Thanks for sharing the story.

L

[Squantos]

EOD potential..........:o)

Awesome Laughs !

Stay Safe !

[Travis McGee]

/1/ Case of commercial grade M-80s.

/2/ Wrist rocket slingshot.

/3/ One to light, one to launch at 45* angle in random directions over sleepy suburban neighborhood.

(Do not fumble or drop lit M-80s.)

Disclaimer: "The above is purely the product of the author's imagination".

[TheErnFormerlyKnownAsBig]

You know, seeing that post of yours right below Squantos' sign off line "stay safe" just doesn't look right.LOL

[patton]

Dang glad I sold my cabin on Bert Lake. LOL.