That's better, Saint. I take great pride in my stupid jokes.
DUMB CRIMINALS
QUICK DRAW
"I read about two guys who robbed a CD store. The first guy says, 'Nobody Move!' Well, his partner moved, and he shot him." -
THE NAKED GUY
"This guy decided to rob a convenience store. He put a bag over his head to hide his face, but had gone in nude! The cops just drove around and eventually found a naked guy jogging with a paper sack in his hand filled with the money. (Several citizens had called the cops to complain about the naked jogger, so he wasn't too hard to find.) When the cops asked him to explain why he robbed the store in the nude, he explained that in every news story he'd read or heard about a robbery, someone was always able to describe the criminals clothing!" --
HIS SECOND TO LAST PHONE CALL
"I have a really good one that happened right here in my home town. A man had just robbed a store and ran from the police. It turns out that he climbed up a tree and the cops were looking on the ground below him not knowing he was in the tree. They were about to give up when the guy's cell phone rang and he answered it!" --