But I digress. . . . Oh wait, I always digress! If it weren't for living in digression, I'd be existentially homeless!
Okayyyyyyy -- too much Gilmore Girls for this kid!! I just love that show! (If they all weren't liberals, it would be Heaven on Earth!) I guess that is why God told the writer guy to make them liberals. Otherwise, I would live at Luke's Diner with the giant coffee mugs, wear my baseball cap backwards, and talk about sex with Babette and Miss Patty. (I wouldn't have sex with them! I'd merely discuss the topic at large [don't go there!] with them. Sheesh! Such gutter-minds in here! SAMWolf and tomkow -- this means you two too!) They -- meaning the Gilmore Girls, Babette, Miss Patty, Luke, Laine, and all the lovely inhabitants of Stars Hollow -- need someone to help Kirk get a life. Not a wife, a life! And if he does happen to get a wife, it would not ever, ever be me!! I would rather be a toad.
Sooooo -- how is everybody this evening?? (I have a fever; any weird ranting-like stuff that comes out of my mouth, fingers, or ears, is all thereby excused. Bob went out and bought me minestrone from Fazoli's. Isn't that sweet of him?? As soon as I finish my drug lollipop, I will begin thinking about having some for dinner. (Minestrone, not more drug lollipops. A box of 24 drug lollies costs over $400. Would I lie to you about lollipops?? Never, I say! Never!!)
You know, I just realized something -- I am a very strange person. I hear that that is coming back into fashion, though! Not "Valley Girl" strange ("gag me with a spoon!"), but more of a Jean-Paul Sartre strange. Or Jean-Michel Jarre. Or possibly both! (The "genius" kind of strange, to be more precise!) (Not that one must be a genius to pull it off; for example, should one learn to walk the walk and talk the talk, one can be dumber than a box of rocks and no one will ever know! Especially if one is the type who reads a lot, but rarely speaks. Mysterious people always throw others off track! Mysterious people are always supremely cool!!)
Okay, I am alive and awake, and that's about it, right at this exact moment in time. (Had you all seen some of the typos I made -- wow! Had I left them in, this entire diatribe could have been a prologue [or prelude or something similar!} to something on the NY Times Best Seller list, or whichever Best Seller List is the coolest these days.)
Anyway -- my fingers really need to wake up and stop playing unfair! So I shall taketh a short sabbatical. (Those [sabbaticals] don't have to be on Sundays; that's just a myth!) Maybe I shall rest fingers, finish poppilop, then discover the meaning of the universe. I'll call -- if that last one happens. Even if the crummy phone lines go kersplat like they did last night! I'll just use my handy dandy mobile phone. Omigosh -- I must enter my pre-paid piece of of paper (that used to be an actual card, but they got super cheap on us!) to Voicestream today, or they will get mad at me and steal my $300 that I have put into that account over the years. The claim it is not "stealing" -- something about my losing "minutes," not "money!" But when I put them in there, it was money. I cannot add or subtract minutes. If I could, I would be God. Or Daylight Savings Time. One of those.
I really must go pour maintenant. You have to be very careful when pouring "maintenant." It's like, another time thing, and you could wind up in another century -- like with E.T. or something. Or in the Delta Quadrant. (Hopefully not with Star Wars dudes, cuz I look really stupid with breakfast Danish strapped to each side of my head!
"You teach best what you most need to learn." --Richard Bach, Illusions. Did any of you just learn anything from that jumbled-up mess?? Good. Then I'm safe! But I must wake up now. (It would be such a help!!)
MUSH love and God bless,
Beep Kierkegaard
P.S. Tomkow, are you related to Mancow?? (He's a hoot!) Have you joined Burqaholics Anonymous yet?? (I won't tell!!) **smooches**