Well, even a fornicator/drunkard deserves a few nice words before the big, dirt sleep.
Maybe like this; “Glynis' uncle had a lust for life and his spirits could not be quenched... Amen.”
If I was the preacher, I would have left my car running and had on my dress Nikes.
“Feets, don't fail me now!” : ^ O
Speaking of Nikes, bet you didnt know that in The Phantom Menace, you can see Darth Maul's nikes when he jumps in the air during the lightsaber fight. :)