I always made sure the kids understood, that when visiting their friends, or in church, in school, or shopping, or just when they were anywhere but at home, they had to behave...
At home, they knew they could let down their hair down, and misbehave, and act up...they knew I would still love them, and not throw them out...of course, their misbehavior could sometimes get out of hand, but in general they knew just how far they could push, before I really exploded...
But they knew they were in extreme big trouble, if I got complaints from the Sunday School, or grade school, or if they were not allowed into their friends homes...