Replies

15) Last, but not least, DO NOT DARE to come down here and tell us how to cook barbecue. This will get your a$$ shot (right after it is kicked). You're lucky we let you come down here at all. Criticize our barbecue, and you will go home in a pine box.. . . Minus your a$$.

This here Damn Yankee challenges you and your slack jaw to a BBQ cook off. For money. American money, not confederate dollars. Loser to publicly proclaim the greatness of the winner, and when this Damn Yankee wins, you, the southern hick, will have to wear a tshirt to a NASCAR race or other site of southern entertainment that proclaims in large print...

I Got My Ass Kicked In A BBQ Cook-off By A Damn Yankee

Are you up to the challenge?

you, the southern hick, will have to wear a tshirt to a NASCAR race or other site of southern entertainment...

For a minute there I thought I was going to have to correct you. I thought you were going to say southern - ahem - culture.

I Got My Ass Kicked In A BBQ Cook-off By A Damn Yankee

LMFAO!!! Now this here's where the fat hits the fire, bud... Ain't nobody, and I mean NOBODY, wants to eat nothin' ol' Max "cooks" up... I know mah limitations and whatnot and that there's one of 'em. I do cook a mean instant-microwavable-artificial-butter-and-bacon-flavored grits, though I do get confused about how much beer to add sometimes...

And I've been using duct tape to good advantage for some time, so don't call me slackjawed or I'll kick yer a$$.