Now you've got it..... a few radio ads, and you'll be in business.
I have another idea. Never mind naming the seventh planet or the moons of Jupiter. I've got something really big in mind. I'm willing to officially name my toes after ten lucky freepers! First come, first served. I'll go in sequence, starting with the left side (little toe) and working right across until all ten are accounted for. Just think of it! Your very own FR screen name will be associated forever with my feet! Send me $100 in US currency via US mail and I'll officially name one of my very own toes after you! But hurry, they'll be going fast and you don't want to miss out on this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. You'll get an email officially notifying you of which toe is "yours," and it will become an heirloom (the email, not the toe) that you can pass on to your children as a permanent momento of this unique transaction. And, as an extra bonus, I'll donate the 10th contribution to FreeRepublic, officially designated as the "PatrickHenry Digital" donation. Now where else can you find a deal like this?