[Prodigal Son]

but if you start peeling them off and beating them silly one at a time,

You don't have to beat a lefty silly- they're already there ;-)
But I know what you're saying. They tend to make funny noises with the proper application of knuckles.

[LouD]

They tend to make funny noises with the proper application of knuckles

Yeah, it's sort of a "squishy-splat" kind of sound, followed by a combination of a pig-like squeal and a feminine whine (and thats just from the males.)