[PatrickHenry]

I am in the process of assembling my la-BOHR-a-tory (the family has acquiesced, I think perhaps to avoid uncomfortable questions from visitors and family alike). Then, I shall obtain a la-bohr-a-tory ferret and call him "Franklin".

Your project has my official approval. But a ferret is a bit too energetic, and potentially destructive. Might I suggest that you get a tortoise instead? A lab tortoise is a wise and silent companion, and in a pinch, you can use it for a footstool.

[longshadow]

A lab tortoise is a wise and silent companion, and in a pinch, you can use it for a footstool.

I recommend it be named "Teddy." Teddy the Tortoise.

BTW, have you ever noticed that scientific cranks seem to have a disproportionate affinity for animal mascots? What does Plato the Platy have to say about this?