[BRL]

Before I draw any conclusions about where you are coming from, I will assume that you are unaware of just how "different" we are talking here. I'd wager that if you look a little deeper, you'll be less willing to make excuses for him. : )

I am sure he will look very bad (The mental health folk have to CYA too ya know!) I will also say that most people involved in something like this do irrational things because they are dealing with an irrational person. I would also say that most anyone that is dealing with a suicidal person cringes at the thought of having their lives put to scrutiny . These people endure enourmous stresses that bring out the best and worse in them. After the fact if one only puts the worse on trial it would be very shameful for most everyone.

[SKempis]

Agreed. People will look for a scapegoat, and people don't always read the signs or respond appropriately.

But you are speaking in generalities. None of which negate the truth of, or mitigate his responsibility for, his particular behavior. (Which most of us see as far more negligent than can be excused as a common reaction. Again - read up on the background. There was a lot more to this than your typical family with a mentally ill member - for which I have much sympathy gained from experience.)

"After the fact if one only puts the worse on trial it would be very shameful for most everyone."

Not as shameful as allowing his worst mistakes to go without censure, thus setting a potentially fatal example for any others in his situation.