I don't know any evangelists, even the weirdos, who believe this.
their constant scriptural quoting attempting to overcome the weight of fossil evidence and the like.
Now, that is funny. Scripture quotations are only relevant in such a context to someone who already believes it is the Word of God. Quoting the Bible in an argument with an unbeliever is stupid (and therefore funny).
There are perfectly valid scientific arguments against evolution. You may not consider such arguments adequate, but they do exist, and have been beaten to death on FR on many threads.