One word response: Rejoice !!
There is, however, hope.
Due to his status in the Coast Guard auxiliary, and considering yours is a true Emergency,
our dear phriend and ally, Tonk (of USO Canteen fame) is diverting a chopper from Oregon
with a food drop, your location.
What are your coordinates for this Mercy Run?
It so happens he has on hand a large cache of WWII 'C' Rations to send.
The canned chicken is good, and Phishbait will like it.
As for the fruitcake, it is NOT a product of razorback- bert's Freeper Island still,
and therefore is quite edible.
P.S. - The Crew has cabin fever!