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Dying boy, 15, gets wish: losing virginity
Chicago Sun Times ^ | 12/23/01 | BY BENJAMIN ERRETT

Posted on 12/23/2001 6:26:24 AM PST by Mopp4

A terminally ill boy had his dying wish granted in Australia this month, but ethicists are still at odds over whether it was the right thing to do.
The wish was not for a trip to Disneyland or to meet a famous sports star. Instead, the 15-year-old wanted to lose his virginity before he died of cancer. The boy, who remains anonymous but was called Jack by the Australian media, did not want his parents to know about his request. Because of his many years spent in the hospital, he had no girlfriend or female friends.
Jack died last week, but not before having his last wish granted. Without the knowledge of his parents or hospital staff, friends arranged an encounter with a prostitute outside of hospital premises. All precautions were taken, and the organizers made sure the act was fully consensual. The issue has sparked fierce debate over the legal and ethical implications of granting the boy's request. By law, Jack was still a child, and the woman involved could in theory face charges for having sex with a minor. The debate was sparked by the hospital's child psychologist, who wrote a letter to "Life Matters," a radio show in which academics debate ethical and moral dilemmas. The scenario was presented in the abstract, with no details about the boy's identity.

"He had been sick for quite a long period, and his schooling was very disrupted, so he hadn't had many opportunities to acquire and retain friends, and his access to young women was pretty poor," the psychologist said recently in an interview with Australia's Daily Telegraph newspaper. "But he was very interested in young women and was experiencing that surge of testosterone that teenage boys have." Hospital staff initially wanted to pool donations to pay for a prostitute, but the ethical and legal implications prevented them from doing so. The psychologist presented members of the clergy with the dilemma and found no clear answer. "It really polarized them," he said. "About half said, 'What's your problem?' And the other half said [it] demeans women and reduces the sexual act to being just a physical one."

Dr. Stephen Leeder, dean of medicine at the University of Sydney and a "Life Matters" panelist, said the issue was a difficult one. "I pointed out that public hospitals operated under the expectation that they would abide by state law," he said. "While various things doubtless are done that are at the edge of that, it's important the public has confidence that the law will be followed." Jack's psychologist, who works with children in palliative care, said the desire was driven in part by a need for basic human contact. "In a child dying over a long period of time, there is often a condition we call 'skin hunger,'" he said. The terminally ill child yearns for non-clinical contact because "mostly when people touch them, it's to do something unpleasant, something that might hurt." Leeder called the diagnosis "improbable." Judy Lumby, the show's other panelist and the executive director of the New South Wales College of Nursing, argued that the details as presented made it abundantly clear the boy's wish ought to be granted. "I said that I would try my darndest as a nurse to do whatever I could to make sure his wish came true," she said. "I just think we are so archaic in the way we treat people in institutions. Certainly, if any of my three daughters were dying, I'd do whatever I could, and I'm sure that you would, too." National Post


TOPICS: Culture/Society; News/Current Events
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To: innocentbystander
Well...maybe the next kid will want a 3 day orgy with drugs, booze... some actresses and one of your pretty teenage daughters.....will you help the poor guy out? C'mon..he's dying....
241 posted on 12/23/2001 12:11:36 PM PST by Sungirl
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To: Cultural Jihad
Counterfeiting is stealing (or lying). Duh.
242 posted on 12/23/2001 12:12:21 PM PST by Osinski
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To: Cultural Jihad
I've read all of your responses so far, and I'll be damned if I can figure out which side of this you are on. Is there a point you are trying to make by some obtuse means, or do you just want to argue with everybody?
243 posted on 12/23/2001 12:13:18 PM PST by FatherTorque
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To: innocentbystander
Not to shock anyone, but some Christians believe that loving sex here on earth, wonderful as it is, is an appetizer for the fullness of interaction we'll share in Heaven, in our perfect immortal bodies. God knows our hearts and desires. On earth all of our cravings are only momentarily satisfied - we become hungry again and again. A virgin who died and lives in Heaven may be pitying us here on earth who have to settle for so little now.
244 posted on 12/23/2001 12:13:32 PM PST by ValerieUSA
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To: NAMMARINE
And did you sin no more?

Woops...

I guess you go to hell then...

245 posted on 12/23/2001 12:14:44 PM PST by DB
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To: Cultural Jihad
I been thinkin about this. The right thing would have been a gift certificate that would have covered at least a lay every week for life. Once, that's an immoral thing to do to a 15 year old. Do hookers issue gift certs?
246 posted on 12/23/2001 12:15:08 PM PST by cocknlock
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Comment #247 Removed by Moderator

To: innocentbystander
Remind me next October too, please - ...I got 'done out' of cooking Thanksgiving dinner this year by an appendectomy, but I might pull it off next year - I already dibs'ed Easter, though, so someone else might nab T-day.

My family doesn't fight over who has to do holiday dinners, we fight over who gets to. I'm just down the road from Quantico & could easily feed a few more mouths.

248 posted on 12/23/2001 12:16:13 PM PST by nina0113
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To: Osinski
Is prostitution legal in Austrailia?
249 posted on 12/23/2001 12:16:47 PM PST by Sungirl
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To: Dumb_Ox
No, no one ever did. That was my reply to your raising the morality argument. It is a given that most people here have religious views one way or another, so that would be where to start when a morality argument is raised.

But I see you want to not take into account the Holy Writ... fair enough, I apologize for my assumption.

Now, what we are dealing here is a strictly logic based morality decision. We have a child who is going to die and a prostitute. The child, who I believe can make adult decisions due to his facing death and hardship in the face for so long, wants to get laid (I am not trying to be condescending, just laying out the facts).

The prostitute prolly uses the pill, they prolly used a condom.... but, there is still that one in a million chance she ends up pregnant.

That is the risk of her business, is it not? She knowingly entered a contract knowing full well she could become pregnant, and that there would be no recourse for her. It stinks, especially if there is a baby, but that is what happened. Most of us, in one form or another, have had to deal with our parents problems. That is life. The prostitute chose her way, and if by some miracle she conceived, then the boys lineage lives on, and she is either blessed or cursed as she interprets it.

250 posted on 12/23/2001 12:17:38 PM PST by bigcheese
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To: innocentbystander
Bye Bye..just wondering why they didnt' want to tell the parents about their sons wish? Could it be that they feel the parents might object for some selfish reason? Hmmm...
251 posted on 12/23/2001 12:18:12 PM PST by Sungirl
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To: John Jorsett
I don't understand some of the comments here. Does the bible say somewhere that sex outside of marriage is a mortal sin? What's this "he's going to Hell" stuff?

Actually, there is some debate on that issue. Some say that any non-marital sex is a sin (thou shalt not commit adultery), but the definition of adultery is in question. I have heard it argued that at the time of Moses adultery was defined as having extra-marital sex, not pre-marital sex.

I have no problem with this kid getting laid before he died, and am glad he did. If I was a virgin male who was dieing that would be my primary wish too. Those who condemn him for this are no better than those who forced the Make a Wish Foundation to deny a dieing kid's wish to shoot a moose (or was it an elk?). Don't force the poor kid to die with his primary dream un-fulfilled!

MARK A SITY
www.logic101.net

252 posted on 12/23/2001 12:18:48 PM PST by logic101.net
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To: bigcheese
If it was a girl who was dying and she was your daughter..would you help her find some stud or neighbor kid to relieve all this adult pressure she has? Why do you think they didn't want to tell the boys parents about this?
253 posted on 12/23/2001 12:21:13 PM PST by Sungirl
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Comment #254 Removed by Moderator

Comment #255 Removed by Moderator

Comment #256 Removed by Moderator

To: logic101.net
No..... adultery meant the same then as it does now. It is easy to see if you read the Torah that there were requirements for if a person seduced a virgin (had to marry her and I believe could never divorce her), etc.. anyway, clearly that was not a capital offenses; whereas, with adultery, it was a capital offense...
257 posted on 12/23/2001 12:31:46 PM PST by bigcheese
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To: innocentbystander
Thank you --- and for consistancy's sake I'll add that a poor woman in a third world country who never had enough to eat in her life before she went to Heaven, may be pitying all of us in America who have so much to eat now, because it just isn't anything in comparison to the direct provision she has from our Father. We may enjoy our food and have plenty - yet still we (some of us) eat and grow overweight. Why does the craving exist beyond "enough"? What do we really hunger for? Will we ever have enough before we die?
258 posted on 12/23/2001 12:38:18 PM PST by ValerieUSA
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To: Sungirl
It would depend. Is she an adult? And not age-wise, but mentally wise? If I ascertained that she was an adult, then no, I would not get her a stud, but neither would I stand in her way. She would be, in my eyes, an adult ready to make her own decisions. Does that mean I have to help her? No. And the friends were prolly fearful of what the parents would say.... but who knows? Perhaps the parents would have thought the same way as the friends but the friends were just too chicken to ask... we simply do not know.

Again, for centuries people younger than this were considered adults.... why? Because of hardship and high mortality. My argument is simply that with the hardship and certain mortality coming his way for, we presume, years, then he probably had developed into what is analagous to my given example of "children" of different centuries.... an adult.

An adult is an adult is an adult. A certain age does not make an adult. History proves this. But your BS about trauma and 12 year olds is clouding any sensical discussion of this. We are talking about death/a 15 year old kid who prolly is able to make adult decisions/etc ... not trauma, not "hurt", not anything like the strawman that you built and that I just burned down.

259 posted on 12/23/2001 12:42:18 PM PST by bigcheese
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To: logic101.net
I have heard it argued that at the time of Moses adultery was defined as having extra-marital sex, not pre-marital sex.

I've heard some fairly religious and orthodox Jews say the same thing. There is nothing in the old testament that can be construed as meaning that ALL pre-marital sex is a sin, only extra-marital sex and pre-marital sex that falls under a few specific exceptions. It seems reasonable to me.

260 posted on 12/23/2001 12:49:55 PM PST by tortoise
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