NO...NO...YOU REALLY MUST READ THIS NOW! If you don't, the Illuminati, the Masons, and the Trilateral Commission will all be trying to get this thread pulled before you have a chance to read it! You don't understand just how powerful they are! They've been running the world now for the last 700 years, since they took the franchise over from the Knights Templar and they're really sneaky! I only know these things because the fillings in my teeth pick up their secret radio transmissions and ...
(PAUSE)
OH, NO!!! THE SECRET Møøse Police are breaking down my door to keep me from spilling the secrets that I .. AND I ALONE .. know about this conspiracy! Have to go now ... bye.
A little traveling music, maestro!