I hear the gods prefer KrispyKreme Doughnuts. Doesn't everyone?
I hear the gods prefer KrispyKreme Doughnuts. Doesn't everyone?
HOLLY: Morning, Dave. I’ve finished your translation.
LISTER: Who’s Cloister? Is it me?
HOLLY: Yes, Dave. The Cats have made you their God.
LISTER: Hey! Working class kid makes good!
HOLLY: Your plan to buy a farm on Fiji and open up a hot dog and doughnut diner has become their image of heaven.
LISTER: What?
HOLLY displays a picture from the Holy Book, showing the noble, biblical, sort-of-Lister standing on a mountaintop, reading a scroll to the black cat. HOLLY reads from the book in voice-over.
HOLLY: “And Cloister spake, `Lo, I shall lead you to Fyushal, and there we shall open a temple of food, wherein shall be sausages and doughnuts and all manner of bountiful things.
The picture changes to one showing the pseudo-Lister standing in front of a sausage and doughnut cart on a beach, with palm trees.
HOLLY: “`Yea, even individual sachets of mustard. And those who serve shall have hats of great majesty, yea, though they be made of coloured cardboard and have humorous arrows through the top.’”
LISTER: Does it say what happened to the rest of the Cats?
HOLLY: Holy wars. There were thousands of years of fighting, Dave, between the two factions.
LISTER: What two factions?
HOLLY: Well, the ones who believed the hats should be red, and the ones who believed the hats should be blue.
Another picture, showing the holy wars. It looks like a scene from the Bayeaux Tapestry.
LISTER: Do you mean they had a war over whether the doughnut diner hats were red or blue?
HOLLY: Yeah. Most of them were killed fighting about that. It’s daft really, innit?
LISTER: You’re not kidding. They were supposed to be green.