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New Regs for washers and dryers.

Washer:
A washer may consist of one circular or oval shaped Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) approved tub holding not more than 15 gallons of water. Water may not be changed between loads.

No detergent may be used except for lye soap. Water may only be disposed of in EPA approved cisterns installed at the owner expense and which shall be drained every six months by EPA pump trucks in accordance with EPA regulations at a cost of $2.00 per gallon.

One washboard consisting of non-galvanized steel may be used for scrubbing clothes: However, banging clothes on EPA approved rocks may be used as an alternative.

Dryers:

Dryers may consist of two Stainless steel poles, having one cross bar each.

Poles may not be set higher than 8 feet from the top of the pole to the Ground level, with no more than a 15ft distance between them.

Cross bars may not be more than 6ft in length and have no more than six stainless steel hooks attached. Hooks may be welded to the crossbar.
Each hook may have one (1) cotton line no more than 1/2 inch thick attached. Totaling 6 lines. Lines may be drawn tight, and a lifting mechanism no more than 10 feet in length may be used to keep the clothes from touching the ground during the drying process. The lifting mechanism must be made from a durable, non-plastic material approved by the EPA.

Anyone caught in violation of these guidelines will be subject to immediate confiscation of all illegal items, as well as the property upon which they are found, $10,000.00 fine, and 10 years imprisonment. Said violators shall also be banned from owning property for a term of not less than 20, nor more than 40 years.