[mabarker1]

The Secret Service is going through visitor logs with a bottle of White Out and scrubbing the surveillance video to replace it with a scene from the movie Reefer Madness and relying on the Short Bus Kindergarten Class of New York's PS90725 to complete the analysis of the bag to try to advance retard^* their investigation, the official explained.

The analysis could take several weeks decades.

^{* No relation or correlation with the "Short Bus" label.}

A Secret Service agent speaking on the condition of anonymity said "Be assured that we will strive to bury this Final Report and Analytical Data deep in the bottom of a Private Septic Tank somewhere in Flyover Country."

[Chode]

no doubt