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Subject: A Proposal for Resolution with a Twist

Dear Representatives Greene and Boebert,

I trust this communication finds you both in high spirits. As a keen observer of the recent heated discourse between you two regarding the impeachment resolutions for President Biden, it’s evident that both of you carry deep-seated passion about our country’s welfare.

It’s crucial, however, to remember our common goal and shared ideals. In this spirit, I propose a resolution that’s somewhat off the beaten path - a friendly competition. This isn’t your usual set of contests, but a collection of challenges that will not only resolve your current issue, but also add a dash of humor and camaraderie to our shared cause.

1. **High-Heel Hurdles:** A challenging obstacle course completed entirely in high heels. This test of balance, agility, and speed is sure to bring a new dimension to resolving political differences.

2. **Lipstick Application Race:** While blindfolded, each of you will attempt to apply lipstick perfectly. The winner will be judged on speed and accuracy.

3. **Balloon Pop Relay:** This competition involves racing to pop a series of balloons - but with a twist. Each balloon must be popped by squeezing it between your bodies, no hands allowed.

4. **Champagne Cork Pop-off:** Each of you will have a bottle of champagne. The one who can pop the cork the furthest distance is declared the victor.

5. **Salsa Dance-off:** In this final event, you will each perform a salsa dance. Judges will rate the performances based on rhythm, technique, and style.

While these contests may seem unconventional, they are designed to highlight the diverse skills and strengths each of you brings to our cause. This approach not only emphasizes our unity and shared goals, but also adds a splash of fun to our daily political discourse.

The representative who wins the majority of these events will then have the privilege to put forth their impeachment resolution.

I am confident that you will both consider this proposal in the spirit of friendly competition and unity that it is intended to promote. After all, we are all on the same team.

Best Regards,

Donald J. Trump
Former President of the United States