If you want to live in a safe “nice” neighborhood it takes money. I have 3 boys, 2 acres, a large house in a very nice safe town that is 99% white. It takes money. Luckily my wife only works part time and from home. Our boys are thriving. But we busted our ass to get here. Not going to apologize either. Study, get a scholarship, get a degree in a STEM field, be an officer in the military, stay married, be involved with your kids. All is possible in the USA if you’re willing to work for it.
Kudos to you and your family! You’re right, it does take money, and it takes time if you don’t have much money. We scrimped and saved, and there were many lean years. We could only afford one car for a long time, until we got it paid off. We drove it for many years after that, but we did get a second car once we had our finances in better order.
We didn’t take lavish vacations. Usually we could only afford a weekend getaway, and very often that was tent camping. I stayed home with the kids, but I volunteered at church, their schools, and in the community. I cooked many many meals from scratch (I still do), and I shopped at resale clothing stores (still do that, too). I did make it a point to get each of the kids two new outfits each season so they wouldn’t feel like everything we had was used.
I think it’s really important for people to make a budget, and stick to it. It can be revised till you come up with a plan that works for you, but it was very important to me that we save money each paycheck. It eventually added up. I’m so glad we did what we did. We have very little debt. We are still paying on our house, but we can finally see light at the end of that tunnel. Credit cards aren’t used much, but when they are, they are paid off in full every month. We had a plan, and we worked that plan. It’s been discipline and perseverance that has gotten us through.