Come on - one spouse not even knowing where the other worked? I’ve had jobs where I couldn’t talk about what I was doing, but my wife always knew who was going to be writing the paycheck.
Yes, a spouse can get a bit touchy about “I need a list of all of your investments” but it comes with the territory.
I worked with a guy who made around $80,000 a year, and his wife was a computer engineer who made nearer to $200,000 a year. Each had personal account, and one joint account. He had absolutely no idea what she spending, and vice-versa. He came to discover that the wife picked up two bonus checks over the previous that she never talked about (each near $15,000). I would agree with you...this ought to be awful rare.
But in the DC area, I’ll bet that there are at least three-hundred couples that have no idea over their combined financial situation. I could see Ohr’s wife easily not telling him the full picture.