[Fiji Hill]

We must ban mini-bikes, bicycles, BB-guns, climbing trees, swing sets, tree houses, skate boards, and swimming for those under 12.

Computer technology provides a solution. Instead of allowing kids to engage in outdoor activities that expose them to the risk of severe injury or even death, we should encourage them to spend their free time playing video games.

[ohioman]

Awesome. I just hope everyone realizes our sarcasm.