I solved the issue long ago......if any of my kids want something when I’m gone they tell me and I write their name in it or if furniture tape to the bottom. I have a good size library and one wants the books. Another wants sentimental type things.....
So this works for me.
I’m not that old yet but have solved the problem by letting people have what they want now. Why make them wait til you’re dead? Daughter asked if she could borrow my pearls for a cocktail party. When she tried to give them back I said keep them. I’ve been giving the granddaughter pieces of my Tiffany jewelry as gifts, graduation, birthdays, etc. They know if they want something all they have to do is ask.