Replies

Cruz at the debate: If we are attacked I will take the advice and council of the Joint Chiefs and our allies and after careful consideration of the affect on families and the environment I will make a careful and considerate response.

(sob) Straight out of The Book of Cruz:

For the Lord has sent unto us a messiah from Havana by way of Calgary yeah unto the very gates of Austin. We only have to believe and accept Cruz into our hearts and we will be saved and Cruz will heal our nation. Yea send him unto the very gates of the heathens in Washington. He will smite the liberals and smite the GOPes and yea even the RINOs, and yea they will feel his mighty power.

He will be seated on a mighty throne in Washington and the members of Congress and yea even the priests of the Supreme Court and the hoards of bureaucrats shall bow their knee unto to him. For he is the mighty Cruz and the Deliverer and Defender of the Constitution.

For the Lord has sent us a mighty naturalized citizen from Canada unto the United States to deliver us from our wicked ways. He shall show us the true way as none other. Woe unto those with New York values. For they are an abomination unto his eyes.

For unto him and his followers the Lord has shown the true way of conservatism. All others shall be cast into the lake of fire. Yea only believe and the mighty and true Cruz will deliver us from abomination. /s

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This fairy tale brought to you by Goldman Sachs and the Mayor of Calgary.
We now return you to our regular programing. Go Trump! (hat tip r-barton)