I probably don;t have an answer, but I do have a joke:
Q: What do you call a group of severely mentally deficient people standing in a group, drinking diet cola, eating freshly picked fruit, and singing hymns and Christmas Carols?
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A: The Moron Tab and Apple Choir.
Q: What's the difference between LSD and LDS?
A: One you take with a cube of sugar; the other you take with a grain of salt.
A #2: With one, you have hallucinations; with the other, "revelations".
Q: What do you get when you cross a Mormon with a [***]?
A: A basement full of stolen groceries.
[***Fill in any ethnicity you feel appropriate].
Supposedly true story told me by a H.S. friend who was a practicing Mormon: While he was Gov of Utah Territory, Brigham Young, who had dozens of wives and scores of children, was standing on the steps of the territorial govt capitol one day while entertaining some visiting bigwig from out-of-state (Senator, Governor?). A little boy walked past them and Brigham said to him something like, "You're a handsome little boy. Who's your father?" And the boy responded, "Brigham Young!"
Reverse the Curse of Cain --- Historically, blacks could join the church but were forbidden to hold even the most minor leadership positions or to participate in most (all?) important Temple rituals. But once the USA's civil rights era really got rolling, criticism didn't just come from outside the church; rather, complaints were growing in volume & frequency withIN the church, especially from young Mormon missionaries who had the misfortune to be posted to Africa and suffer firsthand the cold/hostile reactions of would-be converts or new converts discovering they were the "wrong" skin color. So in the late 70s, this longstanding thorn in their side was solved when good old Spence Kimball - LDS Prez - met w/ his fellow high priests and they experienced yet another one of those famous revelations ... this time that God was telling the LDS to reverse the various prohibitions against blacks.
Soon after, a joke I heard went something like this: "Did you know the Mormons are now bending over backwards to make Afro-Americans feel welcome in their church? Why, they're even changing the words to some hymns in order to make blacks feel more at home! For instance, [sung to the tune of Camptown Races] "A mighty fortress is our God, doodah, doodah...."
Diet caffeine free cola.