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I dont ask about donor status until someone is declared brain dead. The family can be asked to think about it if it is apparent that is the way things are going, and nurses may ask, but it in no way plays into when or if someone is declared brain dead as some of those here would imply. I’m sorry about your brother, have you had your MRI to be sure you don’t have an aneurysm? They can be hereditary

There are no drugs specifically to prepare the body for organ donation. Once brain death has occurred, it is the same drugs that keep the body going prior to the declaration of brain death that are continued. I’m sorry about your experience feeling sterile, etc. Unfortunately once the decision for donation is made, the donor agency takes over and we have nothing to do with it, as our patient has died. I can tell you after we have a donation the staff has meetings, etc as it is traumatic for them that a (usually) young person has died suddenly and tragically. I would hope the donor agency offers the same to the family.

Organ donation is an emotionally draining situation and deeply personal. I’m glad your brother had made the decision ahead of time sparing you the trauma of having to make the decision in a time of tragedy. God bless you in your grief. But please know in no institution I have worked for does the decision to declare brain death depend in any way on donor status. I’m sickened by those who think it does. Medical professionals are not ghouls, most of us are human and have family members ourselves.....

I’m sorry about your brother, have you had your MRI to be sure you don’t have an aneurysm? They can be hereditary.

Yes they can, as we learned during the entire "ordeal." The same Chief of Neurology and his staff that informed us of our brothers condition also told us that the type of aneurysm my younger brother had was in fact hereditary and strongly suggested that my older sister, youngest brother and I all have MRI's/MRA's on our brains.

Looking back on the whole thing, I cannot imagine how a Doctor composes themselves to deliver so much bad news all at the same time. "Your brother is dying, and the type of aneurysm he had is genetic and the three of you need to be tested asap" still rings in my head. I was the only one of the three of us who had the MRI/MRA and I'm fine. I do worry about my sister and younger brother. Neither wanted to know.

I may have misspoke or not explained what I was told properly. You're correct that the same drugs that are used before brain death are continued after brain death to keep the major organs going. What I meant to say was that the Nurse knew when my brother passed (the machines took over for him) and that by continuing the drugs he (male nurse) knew my brother was an organ donor. He told me as much that he knew.

I’m sorry about your experience feeling sterile, etc. Unfortunately once the decision for donation is made, the donor agency takes over and we have nothing to do with it, as our patient has died. I can tell you after we have a donation the staff has meetings, etc as it is traumatic for them that a (usually) young person has died suddenly and tragically. I would hope the donor agency offers the same to the family.

My younger brother (8 years my junior) was 42 at the time of his death. It was hard all the way around. The suddenness of it combined with our being told we needed to be tested right away was alot to get hit with all at once. I will say the nursing staff at the hospital was just top notch. I can't imagine going through what they do on a daily basis and manage to keep my compassion for others vs. becoming cold to it all.

Yes, organ donation does take that decision burden off the family however there were still papers to sign and that responsibility fell on my 19 year old niece as his next of kin. My older sister and I tried so hard to get the organ donation folks let us sign the paperwork to take that burden away from her but they wouldn't let us. Poor girl to this day thinks she signed her fathers death warrant and there's literally nothing any of us can say at this point that we've already said hundreds of times over to convince her otherwise.

I wouldn't wish the entire experience on my worst enemy. Medical professionals are not ghouls, most of us are human and have family members ourselves.....

My "ghoulish" reference wasn't at the nurses or doctors involved in my brothers care. That was directed at the organ donation process/professionals who upon my brothers declaration of death by the chief neurologist told us they'd been following my brothers case since he was admitted to the hospital. They were matching his organs to recipients before he passed. That's ghoulish IMO even though I understand the necessity for what it is they do.

Thanks for your reply. I can tell you're an excellent and compassionate nurse. :-)