Just drop a hint that you are a transgendered lesbian parapalegic with an Hispanic surname and that you have to take care of your illegal alien nieces and nephews as soon as ICE delivers them from the border crossing holding station. The Census folks should be able to make an exception. Heck, they might even send you a check!
Wife and I escorted the ‘census taker’ off our property a couple of years ago. He walked around a security gate and two No Trespassing signs.
I told him I would call the sheriff if he returned.
He didn’t.