(Joe Biden was one of the early ones into the program...)
Our New, Happy Lives!
“Comrades!” cried the press secretary’s eager youthful voice. “Attention, comrades! We have glorious news for you. We have won the battle for affordable health care!
Returns now completed of the output of all classes of medical goods and services show that the quality and quantity has risen by no less than twenty percent over the past year, and the cost therefor has plummeted by thirty percent!
All over Amerika this morning there were irrepressible spontaneous demonstrations when workers marched out of factories and offices and paraded through the streets with banners voicing their gratitude to Comrades Obama and Sebelius for the new, happy life which their wise leadership has bestowed upon us.
Here are some of the completed figures. Head transplants and exclamation marks—“
(Joe Biden was one of the early ones into the program...)
That’s awesome. So accurate.