The most touching and telling mark of his great character was that after the war, he took care of his invalid wife until her death, and then took care of his mother until she died. What other “great” men in history did that?
Wife’s family can trace her line back to Robert E. Lee.
You are describing actions that are expected of every decent person.
Who would abandon their ailing wife or ailing mother?
Why should Lee receive adulation for observing the absolute minimum level of personal honor?
Lee was a man of great character, with a tragic flaw, and certainly deserves admiration on many fronts - but it is bizarre to say that he should be admired because he did not abandon his wife and mother.
What other “great” men in history did that?
Another great man in history, the heroic William Tecumseh Sherman, also tended to his foster mother and his wife in their dying illnesses as well.
Also, many millions of others who are not "great men in history" have taken care of their families.
Actually, now that I think about it, that was quite impressive, since he died more than three years before she did.
and then took care of his mother until she died
"Then took care of his mother?" His mother died when he was 22 years old.
He actually rushed home from graduation in New York to be by his mother's bedside for her last few days.
It was apparently his sister, Anne Lee, who primarily cared for their mother in her last illness, and she is the one who sent for Robert so he would not miss her last days.
He left a few days later for the first failed attempt to build Fort Pulaski in Georgia.