You evil closet case! Why are you hating on these loving couples (who are more loving, and probably get more every night, than you do, or your parents or grandparents), and refusing to reconcile with their warm wonderfulness?
You need to be re-educated!! Off with your head! You ... you .... medievalist you! You ..... Christian!!
(Etc., etc., etc. -- just trying to get all the memes out there for discussion.)
They don’t really want it limited to 2 people, or even just adults in the long run.
This is the big one, the long-awaited Supreme Court attack on marriage itself, the one that removes marriage as a heteronormal, society-stabilizing institution.