About 20 years ago, I was going through a divorce. Our only son was 10 years old. My wife was angry, bitter and full of vengeance ...and sleeping with her lawyer. There were times she told me she was out to destroy me, and was willing to accuse me of anything to get custody of our son.
I joined Texas Fathers for Equal Rights. Some of the meetings I attended were like group therapy. A lot of the men had been divorced for a while, paying child support, but were there trying to get help because the mothers weren't allowing visitation. Some of these men were barely making it financially, but were wanting to see their kids. They sounded like "women haters", but the truth is, they were so beaten down by a judicial system stacked against them, they felt like they were fighting the entire world.
With the help of T.F.E.R., I ended up representing myself. We agreed on a joint custody, but my son's mother didn't really participate that much. I ended up raising him by myself.
Amongst my working peer group, men in similar situations started approaching me. I soon discovered a great untold story. The huge number of protective fathers rescuing their kids from unstable mothers. Over the years I became shocked at how many times the story repeated itself.
Men fighting hard to become the custodial parent...in order to protect their children. There is a great story ready to be told, but unfortunately, it doesn't fit into the "male sexual predator" mold the press and Hollywood like to focus on, so it will remain a well kept secret truth.
Your story is not uncommom. I recognize that. You also do not sound like a woman hater in this post. Although I wouldn’t blame you if you ended up as one.
I am glad you fought for your son. Sons NEED a father. Any woman that would deny her son a father out of bitterness has problems. I understand that men in these situations feel abused by their ex wives and the system. I UNDERSTAND their hatred. I really feel for them. It seems that women hold all the cards in custody/child support cases. It has gotten a little better in recent years but the deck is still stacked in favor of mothers.
I have tried to convince some of the ‘women haters’ on this forum that we are not all angry and bitter. I hope all of you find good women that you can love and cherish and one that loves and respects you as a man.
Blessings!