[ConservativeStatement]

Wait a sec. Ben Affleck is from Cambridge, Mass. Is he not? And isn't his wife Jennifer Garner from West Virginia? I admit, I don't follow much of current Hollywood, so I could be mistaken but if true...what does Ben Affleck think of this column and his toothless wife?

[Tax-chick]

There’s a strong correlation between bad teeth and drug/alcohol abuse. Boozers and druggies, including women, are found in both cities and rural areas.

Jennifer Garner has excellent hair.