Your tagline is great. I feel the exact same way, but fall (with equal enthusiasm) in the McCain camp.
To vote for McCain, I would have to hold my nose, cover my mouth and close my eyes, and that would cause me to suffocate in the dark. He would lose in a mammoth landslide, so I would use the opportunity to try to build a conservative party from the rubble, either through the existing infrastructure of the GOP, as Reagan did in 1976, or in a new party, as Lincoln did in 1856.