Just throwning my two cents in on the discussion about the shooter. I think the writings at
post 2032 are very key to some of the shooter's "issues". When he refers to the term "left behind", he's referring to the series of books/movies, "Left Behind", describing what will happen to people at the end of times who remain on earth after Christ returns and takes all believers to heaven in the Rapture.
He describes a family and/or church that reinforces a good amount of fear of going to hell should they ever backslide or sin.
I remember as a child laying awake at night, terrified that I was going to “get left behind” for some childish bad thing I’d done or thought or some mistake I’d done. That was around age 8-12 and I would continue to have similar fear through my teenage years. I remember being terrified around year 2000 and always worried about this...”antichrist” who was going to somehow do all these terrible things to people who weren’t “born again” AND had not lost their salvation/committed some sin. I’d lay awake at night and be terrified during the day asking over and over “what if I commit a sin, and don’t have time to confess and ask God forgiveness and repent and get...left behind?!” “what if I’m in some sin that I don’t even recognize and I get......left behind?” “what if I’m watching something on TV that’s somehow a “sin” and Jesus returns and I get......left behind?” “what if I commit the unpardonable sin and get....left behind?”
Some days I’d even lay awake worrying that I had dropped a few cents while placing my 10% tithes into the offering plate or that I had miscalculated my tithes and....something bad would happen........
He's fixated on committing any type of sin, even accidently cheating on his tithe by a few cents, getting into an accident, dieing...and thus ending up in hell, or being left behind after the rapture. He's fixated on a mistaken belief (IMO) that since he can't be perfect, he's going to end up in hell anyway...so what's the point in trying.
I don't know if he was also developing a mental illness, but this may have added to his paranoia, personality disorder, whatever you want to call it. It is very sad to look inside a mind that believed he had no hope, and then filled it with hatred and anger. It appears he rebelled against this all-or-nothing ideology and wanted to find more truth in his quest with God. Unfortunately, it seems he tried to change the church, the mission, the family, whatever, instead of leaving home and furthering his personal religious quest for answers for himself. Maybe he could have found peace with Christians who understood his background and would have led him to Christ's love and forgiveness before he decided to kill others.
Just some thoughts. Thank goodness for Jeanne Assam who stopped him from killing any more people. May God bless her as she goes forward.
I think your observations are very apt.
It is tragic that no one in that system either saw sufficiently the vision of the kids whole reality
or didn’t have the ability to slice through it with redemptive TRUTH IN LOVE.
Perhaps therefore, God at his point of death gave him another chance. That’s not a Biblical conjecture per se . . . though I don’t know that The Bible ABSOLUTELY prevents it. But I could imagine God giving him a life review in seconds and then another chance at accepting Christ once and for all. We shall see. Certainly there was plenty of reason to say he deliberately and repeatedly CHOSE evil in anger and revenge over his maltreatment . . .
Thankfully, God alone is the judge of all that.
Sorry it took so long to write ya back. I’ve read almost the entire left behind series, and saw the first movie. (I still have 3 books to read). I agree, if he was serious in all of those postings ....whatever was wrong with his mind, the story of the rapture made it worse. Especially if he indeed thought he could lose his salvation. Such a terrible terrible plight, and a tragic ending.