Dude! I hope that you are joking. I laugh at comedy. I chuckle at sarcasm. Sometimes people say crazy things after a few drinks that they wish they had not said.
Hopefully you’re not in your right mind this evening, because it wasn’t funny before and it’s not funny now.
If you are serious, then you have some issues that you should seek professional help with.
Wishing for Oprah or “every shallow young lady” to have a flaming tire as a fashion accessory is not funny.
You oughta take a chill pill and save the lectures for your children.