Nope, not an attorney but I can imagine something like this:
So, you’re the owner?
Sign here and I’ll shop here gladly. If you refuse, I’m going to consider that you’ve got something to hide and proceed accordingly.
AFFIDAVIT
UNDER PENALTY OF PERJURY, THE UNDERSIGNED ASSERTS THE FOLLOWING:
“I ____Petronski____ hereby warrant and affirm that all employees employed at Petronski Village Manufacturing are verified, legally employed personnel.
“I agree to mitigatory damages of (One Hundred Thousand Dollars) for any person illegally in my employ, whether directly or through an agency, with any such damages to be paid in cash on demand to BEARER of this original document.
Signed, ____________________________________
Date: _______________________________________
Present that to your local super market managers and you'll be doing a lot of bartering, because I expect they'll kick you out on your ear....if they can stop laughing long enough to do it.