You should have seen the documentary Discovery aired a couple of days before Easter. Jesus, as a small boy, used His mojo to make another child disfigured because he had the audacity to bump into Him in passing. Then, when a playmate fell off a rooftop, and Jesus was blamed for his death, Jesus jumped from the top of the roof and raised the kid from the dead and demanded that the kid tell them the truth of what had happened. Finally, as Simon went to help Jesus carry the cross, Jesus did a Freaky Friday on him, so it was Simon who was really crucified while Jesus looked on and laughed. There was also something about Jesus becoming a giant after the Resurrection (wait, I thought it was Simon who died). No word on if he stomped Tokyo.
What data did Discovery use to support this oh-so-obvious malarkey? I’m very curious about this. It kind of reeks about End Times stuff when somewhat respected media starts blatantly spewing such garbage.
While floating along in the Ark, Noah was attacked by PIRATES.
I am not making this up.
There's even an English folk song, "The Bitter Withy", I used to sing it quite a bit when I taught a history of ballads course . . . The Virgin has to go out, and she tells Jesus "let me hear no ill of you when I come home." He is playing with a couple of rich kids who mock him for being "but a poor boy, born in an asses stall", so he makes a bridge out of the rainbow and runs across it. The kids try to follow him and of course fall and are killed. And when the Virgin gets home, she pulls a withy (willow branch) and whips Jesus within an inch of his life. So he curses the willow tree - "Oh bitter withy, oh bitter withy, that caused me so to smart. The withy shall be the firstest tree to wither from the heart."
It's actually an interesting area of folk legends and ballads.