One thing I do agree with you on is that the school system is telling fantastic liberation stories about Lincoln and I think that's wrong. I just respect this decisions because his life and the country life was on the line and he went for it.
Since my heritage is not in the South I don't have an emotional connections to their defeat or the wrongs commited against them by Lincoln and the North but I like the result of that period with is a slave free country (regardless of originator) compared to one that was based on slavery and agriculture.
You seem to be ignoring the factory owners in the north who made millions producing textiles. They had 'slaves' too, some were eight and ten year old children who lived in conditions that were worse than those in the south. Many of them ended up with brown lung disease, if they didn't die or lose a limb in the factory.
There were good and bad in the north and in the south. There were both black and white slaves and believe it or not -- there were black slave owners. Lots of them.