I noticed that you suggested that I become a fireman. I don't know if you know it or not but the LA City council just settled a case for 2.7 million dollars against The LA City Fire Department because a black fireman (who called himself "The Big Dog") was given a spoonful of dog food in his spaghetti after a Volley Ball game where he continually taunted his fellow firefighters to: "Feed the Big Dog."
I fear that if I join the fire department (being a white guy and all) that if I were to be at all humorous during my down time, that I could get fired and subject my nearly bankrupt city to new lawsuits that could threaten my new career as a firefighter.
Now if, as you suggest, I learned the ways of Matrix and was able to pluck weapons from the hands of these gang members, don't you think I might accidentally cause injury to their trigger fingers and then destroy my career and further bankrupt my employer?
And what if one of the bullets bounces off my vest and accidentally ricochets back at the gang member and he gets hurt? What kind of trouble could I be in then?
And if, as you suggest, I give a gang member a crack pipe and he breaks it and cuts his lip, then couldn't I be personally liable under some kind of products liability lawsuit?
Oh great war sage, please help me.
Desperately yours,
LA Cop
Dear Sun & Cop,
The object is not for you to die for your city. It's for the other SOB to die for his city.
Have the LA Cops be Criminals and have the Criminals be Cops. Then the criminals can off the cops.
And it'll be legal. (Doc Holliday)
Patton Out
Ah, LA Cop, you have much to learn.
'The Big Dog' attended Sun Tzu's secret school of frivolous lawsuit. Sun Tzu would eat the dog food for 2.7 MILL... Did you say 2.7 Mill?? For a taste of dog food??
In the words of Napoleon Dynamite: "lucky"
Sun Tzu has noted that you are at a serious disadvantage in the race category. Though you may still play the 'transgender' card should you go to the Fire Dept.
So many liability questions have made Sun Tzu sleepy. Much yellow perch has also severely impaired Sun Tzu's thinking. I must go ponder these questions at my leisure before I go to off-duty job.
Sun Tzu has a headache.