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"Back before Kindergarten, my parents had to make a decision. Whether to send me to a deaf school and learn how to sign or send me to a public school where I would have to learn how to join the hearing world. They were told that if I learned to sign (which is way easier than lip reading), it would be near impossible for me to join the hearing world as an adult. So my parents threw me into the public school and I learned the hard way to communicate with hearing people."

I once was assaulted by a (hearing) mother whose venom took me completely by surprise. I gradually calmed her down, and we got to talking. Turned out her son had a hearing impairment (much less severe than my own) and as a high-school Freshman his grades had slipped. Rather than diagnosing a typical case of Freshmanitis, his pediatrician (who should be shot) had recommended he be transferred to a Deaf school. And within two weeks the kid was refusing to wear his hearing aid and communicating entirely in sign. The mother hated, hated, hated that but was trying to be supportive. That's why she went ballistic on me when I'd innocently advocated mainstreaming when on a panel with her in the audience. After our chat, we both understood where her anger had come from, and my heart went out to her: her son was virtually lost to her.

I wonder how that turned out. Probably not well.

Regarding your story - I did send my kid to deaf school and she loves it. I had to do what was best for her, not me. She was one of five deaf/hh kids in a southern CA school program....the only deaf one; the other four were HH and hispanic. At her school, she participates in everything. We went back to visit her friends after a year for the 8th grade graduation. One kid is being held back and had joined a gang. The other boy joined a gang too. The girl didn't know where she was going to go to HS.

I think its a matter of perspective.

Best,
Mary

And within two weeks the kid was refusing to wear his hearing aid and communicating entirely in sign. The mother hated, hated, hated that but was trying to be supportive. That's why she went ballistic on me when I'd innocently advocated mainstreaming when on a panel with her in the audience. After our chat, we both understood where her anger had come from, and my heart went out to her: her son was virtually lost to her.

90% of deaf children are born to hearing parents. In many cases, the parents have a difficult time accepting their kids. They believe that their world has turned upside down.

But it does not have to be that way. Probably what they have to do is to find God and make things the best they can be.

Above all, it is important that the parents find a communication method that suits their child, whether it is in Cued Speech, American Sign Language, etc....

Cochlear Implant and hearing aids do help but it is really case by case basis. Above all else, parents need to discover a way to communicate and connect with their child, no matter which method.